The Daily Ping

This Ping redesign took 7 years and cost $58 million in taxpayer dollars.

December 3rd, 2005

From the Devil Cultist

We’ve all seen thousands of those stupid Nigerian scam e-mail s cross our paths at this point, but this morning I received an e-mail that is quite different. I’m going to share it with you as I received it:

From: devil cultist ddevilfamily@xxxxxxx
To: JANETCULTIST@xxxxxxxxx
Subject: MAIL ME BACK ONTIME

YOU NEED TO CORPORATE WITH ME OR GET KILL

I AM DEVILSON I AM AN ASSASIN I WAS HIRE TO KILL YOU AND I HAVE BEEN PAYED TO TAKE YOUR LIFE REALLY I DONT KNOW WHAT YOU HAVE DONE BUT YOU NEED TO HELP YOUR SELF IF YOU DONT WANT TO DIE NOT THAT I AM HAPPY TO KILL YOU BUT I NEED TO DO MY JOB COS I WAS BORN TO IT I WILL NOT TELL YOU ANY THING MUCH NOT ONTILL YOU MAIL ME BACK AND I WILL LIKE TO TELL YOU NOT TO PLAY SMART GAME WITH ME COS IF YOU DO I SWEAR TO GOD I WILL KILL YOU FAST AS I CAN DO I JUST WANT TO HELP YOU THAT IS WHY I AM MAILING YOU I HAVE ALL YOUR FULL INFORMATION WITH ME AND I WILL TELL YOU LITTLE ABOUT THE PERSON THAT WANTED TO KILL YOU SHE IS A WOMAN AGE OF 34 YEARS THAT IS ALL I NEED TO TELL YOU ABOUT HER I SUPPOSE TO CALL YOU ON YOUR PHONE NUMBER BUT IF I DO SHE WILL KNOW COS EVERY CALLS I MAKE FROM NOW TILL I KILL AS BEEN CONNECTED WITH HER PHONE ALL YOU NEED TO DO IS TO OBEY ME AND I WILL HELP YOU OUT OF THIS COS I DONT WANT YOU TO DIE I HAVE YOUR PICTURE WITH ME, I GOT IT LAST NIGHT AND I WANT YOU TO KEEP THIS MESSAGE PERSONAL TO YOUR SELF COS IF YOU SHARE IT OUT THAT MEANS YOU HAVE COST MORE TROUBLE TO YOUR SELF.

HERE ARE MY COMMANDMENT’S

1, DONT TRY TO BE SMARTER THAN YOUR SELF COS ALL EYE’S ARE WASHING YOU.

2, DONT TRY TO TELL ANY ONE ABOUT THIS OR ELSE I WILL KILL YOU IN COLD BLOOD.

3, DONT TRY TO CONTACT THE POLICE COS IF YOU DO I

SWEAR TO GOD I WILL KILL YOU AND YOUR FAMILY COS POLICE ARE MY WORST ENEMY.

4, DONT TRY TO RUN COS YOU CAN RUN BUT YOU CANT HIDE.

5, OBEY ME AND YOU SHALL LIVE FREE.

mail me back into devilson@xxxxxxx that is my personal mail address

IF YOU OBEY ME YOU SHALL LIVE FREE COS I DONT REALLY WANT TO KILL YOU AND IF YOU MAIL ME BACK I WILL TELL YOU MORE INFOR ON HOW YOU CAN HELP YOUR SELF PUT OF THIS MAIL ME IMMEDIATELY YOU RECEIVE THIS MESSAGE THE EARLIER THE BETTER.

I particularly like commandment #1: “Don’t try to be smarter… cos all eye’s are washing you.”

Posted in Just Plain Odd

What is this then?

The Daily Ping is the web's finest compendium of toilet information and Oreo™® research. Too much? Okay, okay, it's a daily opinion column written by two friends. Did we mention we've been doing this for over ten years? Tell me more!

Most Popular Pings