Aw, nuts. I’m watching this show again. I can’t… help… it. It’s like a car crash: you just have to look (although I’m not one of those people who slows down. Really.)
To draw out the analogy, though, I guess I slowed down because I actually took notes on this past week’s first episode. I had a purpose: to rap with my friend Mandy about it. I would now like to share some of the prime cuts of notes with you:
Julie – remember her from the special. Very nieve!! Very stupid!! Can’t form solid sentences. Very much dependent upon her parents. No relationships? hm.
The house – cool, an Ikea Mansion! Hey, that’s the couch I want in the living room! They use Prodigy – bah. Badass bathroom. Julie is an airhead, for sure. A nieve, childish airhead! Add boobs and you’ve got Amaya.
This now feels like a stupid social club, and I would feel like an immediate outsider in this house. Everyone fits in a very neat label.
Melissa will get pregnant by the end of the season.
David looks like the bassist from No Doubt. That’s some honor.
That girl David brought home is cute. What kind of pickup line did he use? And she’s from Illinois too! They should’ve just done this season in Chicago. Less travel for those involved.
At least I acknowledge that it’s garbage TV, right? That’s the first step, right? Right?! -pm
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